Sunday, April 22, 2012

Home Again

Sunday, January 29, 2012

The Milwaukee and Wisconsin News: HOW TO BE A SEMITE DOCTOR 01 29 2012

The Milwaukee and Wisconsin News: HOW TO BE A SEMITE DOCTOR 01 29 2012: HOW TO BE A SEMITE DOCTOR 01 29 2012 “Someone Semite is trying to Dim Mak my nuts,” I thought as the ethnic Doctor held them and asked me...

Thursday, January 12, 2012

All College Fraternities to be Outlawed 01 12 2012

All College Fraternities to be Outlawed 01 12 2012
When I went to college ~1988 there was a group of fraternity like young men who would pick up women and have sex with them.  Here is the part you wouldn’t know about, they had a way so that they could watch their buddy having sex with the woman and the young woman wouldn’t know about it.  She wouldn’t be aware she was being watched.

When the buddy was having sex with her they would all gather around that secret watching place and say, “Show Time.”  She couldn’t hear the noises they made while watching either.

If you were a woman that went to college from1988 to present do you feat that a fraternity has a secret recording of you having sex with a frat brother?  Are there such viewing library collections?  Do men often fail to look at you because they have already had what they consider an intimate experience viewing of you?  And conversely if you are a man have you had women look at you in such already had an intimate experience viewing of you?

Can anybody tell me what good a fraternity does for a democracy?  It would seem to me that by the time you are a man you have abandoned your tree house gang behavior.  Ask yourself the serious question, “What good does an adult tree house gang do for the health of our nation?”

If I were President I would outlaw all fraternities!

 Thomas Paul Murphy
         Copyright 2012 Thomas Paul Murphy

Originally published on:  01 12 2012 at: www.macabre-writings.blogspot.com
PS. I was never a member of a fraternity and nor did I participate in such "Show Time" viewings.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

The Milwaukee and Wisconsin News: As my nose bled 01102012

The Milwaukee and Wisconsin News: As my nose bled 01102012: "As my nose bled I realized the taste of steak in my mouth again." Thomas Paul Murphy Copyright 2012 Thomas Paul Murphy Originally pub...

Sunday, October 3, 2010

If you...

If you are reading this post you are likely to be the resultant malformed sire of a shit dicked mongoloid.


I used to have more class than to say things like this, but I think there is a strong element of truth to something here...


God Please Forgive Me

Thomas Paul Murphy


Copyright 2010 Thomas Paul Murphy

10 03 2010   http://macabre-writings.blogspot.com/

Friday, October 1, 2010

Somewhere in a Western 10 01 2010

“She once dated a man named Mangus,
who felt so strongly of her Angus.”

Thomas Paul Murphy
Copyright 2010 Thomas Paul Murphy

Originally published on 10 01 2010 at:  http://macabre-writings.blogspot.com/

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Bulging Eyed Albino Love Slaves 07 13 2010

Caution: Do not read if you are a sensitive individual.  This story was meant as a spoof on how much we really know about our differences.  And is meant pose questions in a humorous sense however macabre.  I understand why someone thought it was offensive, as I find Jay Leno's humor very offensive myself, and think it is below the national standard of what we should be.  And as I read this now it offends me a too and I wrote it, but I will let it stand here and I stand by this theory-- of where it belongs Macabre. 


 Bulging Eyed Albino Love Slaves 07 13 2010
Or Beals and Beels                 
   One hundred and fifty thousand years ago civilization began in Africa.  It is said a group made its way from Africa and from there colonized the rest of the world.  So the question that begs an answer is, “Were whites once black or blacks once white?”
   If you believe we are descended from apes, what color is the skin of an ape under its fur.  Is it white or black?  If it is black, were where a few bulging eyed albino cave women?  The Albino gene does seem to run in all species, white bears, squirrels, deer, bulls, etc. The bulging eyes part is a convention that just makes the story funny.
  Did these bulging eyed Ablino women make coveted lovers.  Where they hidden in caves and made captive love slaves?  “Lenora sat in the cave with anxiety and anticipation for the one thing in life that to her made it worth living.”  It matters not whether she could escape or not, she grew bulging eyes as a seer in the dark in order to adapt.
  Are the bulging eyes of these said Albino cave women a mutation as they sought to see better in the dark, “When the men will be visiting with them.”
  Did these Albino cave women develop a second sight within their brains for some want of sex as they spryed as to when what men will be next.  Did the Bulging Eyed Albino Cave Women unable to see through the dark learn to see through their minds eye, in caves of sequester?
  Was this psychic ability then passed along to all races and colors.  Medicine men, shamans or witch doctors are said to be able to read entrails and determine the future.  Do these Bulging Eyed Albino Love Slaves have that ability?  Do they have the ability to read the discarded or disembodied energy bodies of humans?   If they have the ability to read the energy life signature of humans, what do they see?  Past, present and future?
  Were the Bulging Eyed Albino Women really apes that were albino and sequestered and made captive as love slaves or where they pariahs and outcasts that roamed and colonized other lands?
  What is the genetic advantage to not being able to be in the sun?  Are the Bulging Eyed Albino Love Salves that will indeed lead humanity through a post apocalyptic world of darkness?  Is this the true purpose of the Bulging Eyed Women? 
  In effect do the bulging eyes signify the words,” When will I (pronounced eye) be next.”
Upon reflection on this essay into the origins of mankind and his propogation, I am leaning towards a fifty/fifty probability that they were indeed Bulging Eyed Ebony Love Slaves or BEELS for short.  Either way it is pronounciated the same.  Because if you lived in a love slave sequestering cave there might be advantages, formed through adaptation passed down genetically to being black.  In a timid high voice she whispered in the darkness, “Lenora ain’t here.” 

God Bless Those That Do Not Feel Compelled To Write Stuff Like This

Constructive Nonsensical Humor,
   by Thomas Paul Murphy

Copyright 2010 Thomas Paul Murphy
 

Monday, August 23, 2010

A Reluctantly Quick Rose for Miss Emily 11 4 2009

This one was part of an assignment for a writing class.  It was a rewrite of the original and had the class in stitches. The work it is based on is said to be one of the most well read items in literature.  Miss Emily is a gal in the old south who lost her husband and lives alone, etc. Home is said to be a man that likes gentlemen. Read the background somewhere else....

A Reluctantly Quick Rose for Miss Emily 11 4 2009

  On the darkly stained dresser in the bedroom, Miss Emily had set out Homer cigars for Mr. Barron and a glass of tinctured ale.
  “Those are my favorite cigars Ms. Emily.”  Homer said as he took one and sucked on it, sliding it in his mouth a good more than halfway ostensibly to get a good taste.
  Miss Emily Spoke, “Homer I know we may not be totally for each other in terms of your preference.  So I’ve got Tobe give you a little show to get you started.”
  Miss Emily opened the creaking bedroom door and said, “Tobe now you come on in and show Homer.”
  Tobe entered the darkly framed doorway shaking like leaf with his eyes facing the floor.  He was wearing a white dress identical to Miss Emily’s.
  Homer was becoming a little queasy and lay down on the bed.
  Miss Emily then instructed Tobe, “Dance around a little bit for Mr. Homer.  Do that fancy little shuffle two step.”
  Upon seeing this Homer longingly reached and outstretched his arms to Tobe and pursed his lips.  Homer was now making endearing and genuine kissy faces with his rosebud mouth to Tobe.
  Miss Emily’s could now see her plan was coming to fruition. 
  Miss Emily then instructed Tobe, “Now we’ll do the steps I proscribed.”
  Tobe and Miss Emily’s hooped floor length dresses would not show their feet movement as they continually faced Homer and while gliding around each other in a circle.
  After a little while of this Tobe exited and Miss Emily shut the door.
  Tobe went to his quarters and wept while back in the foreboding room with the curtains pulled, in the deepest voice she could summon Miss Emily said to Homer, “This is Tobe I’m getting in bed with you now.”


Copyright 2009 Thomas Paul Murphy

Friday, July 9, 2010

Feeding At the Aquarium 07 09 2010

Feeding At the Aquarium 07 09 2010

~

They held his head deep down inside their childrens’ aquarium tank

Sharpened teeth then learned to scrape away at his skull

His voice became thick and dull

Mothers' that ogled and leered but wouldn’t spank

~

They had stalked him throughout the day

He was innocent of crime and never gay

Taunting and slighting is how they made their way

The people with nothing good to say

~

Goddess like women tempted and rebuff

Vying for a rib that creates good stuff

From a man weakened from lack of captive muff

~

When a little of his scalp grew back

He was dunked again to resume the attack

~

It’s okay, he does not feel pain

He can’t if we labeled him insane

Quick take another bite and resume the drain

~

Tiny biters refused and with glaring enragement she mifted

No one will believe a small percent afflicted

Who didn’t know they were the truly gifted

He screamed in horror as they then sifted

~

They did not seek him on a whim

He was a journeyman of strong ambition

On his travels far they isolated and captured him

~

Whenever they saw the sight of his blood

The joy within them surged like a flood

~

Suffering and fighting he became more immune

To the teeth that snapped and cut from the women with mouths of fume

He then deprived them of wiggly womb

~

When possessions failed

Tempers heated and weak hands flailed

~

Its’ always been this way she did reinforce

As she bit into his skin on her breaks from piercing discourse

Her husband couldn’t stop smiling after their divorce

~

She then dried up with little spew

The once so proud of little few

~

~

Thomas Paul Murphy

~

Copyright 2010 Thomas Paul Murphy

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Mostly Unrelated and Incoherent McCabre 07 08 2010

Mostly Unrelated and Incoherent McCabre 07 08 2010

~

If it’s a car that big and in sits a bitch

Does it have a boat and hitch

~

Nails that were meant for scratching

Get yourself to cookie batching

~

When he sees something different

We’s knows there’s trouble

~

No I won’t look at you

And crash that car from Kalamazoo

~

She got her butt stuck in the ladder chair

Did I help her, I didn’t dare

~

Take your white trash ass

And use up some gas

~

How come when I tell you, it is funny?

When someone else says it, you cry?

~

I will drag you to the creek

And make you suck on a hermaphrodite

~

How do they get a watermelon to be yellow?

They force it to have sex with a banana and a lemon

~

Betty crotch hair

~

Take Your Carp Bait and Head for the River~

~

I lost my baby down by the river

She had my carp bait

It was made of liver

~

Take your white trash ass

And use up some gas

~

I feel much better now that I have beaten my slave

And I’ll feel much better when he sleeps in his grave

~

I want to be an engineer

And after that I’ll join the army as a new queer

~

Son I’m giving you all the materials to make your own dynamite

~

Invention: “The Thomas Paul Murphy Portable Boat Ramp” for launching your boat places they don’t want you to.

~

“Moth Ball Lozenge” (please don’t eat them)

~

A Rootling Snout

~

God Bless People Who Don’t Feel Compelled to Write Stuff Like This (Well to be fair to myself) at least I don’t feel compelled to post naked close ups of my penis hole or hair on nuts) And that wording there is almost too graphic for my own high personal standards.

~

Thomas Paul Murphy

~

Copyright 2010 Thomas Paul Murphy

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

The Deadened Bodies Song

The Deadened Bodies Song 06 10 2010

~

Don’t I see something moving there underneath the blanket?

That’s just the deadened bodies

The deadened bodies

Can I take a look underneath the blanket?

That’s just the deadened bodies

The deadened bodies

What’s that hand sticking out there from underneath the blanket?

That’s just the deadened bodies

The deadened bodies

And now you’ll join them

And now you must join them

The deadened bodies

The deadened bodies

~

Thomas Paul Murphy

~

Copyright 2010 Thomas Paul Murphy

Meat Nails a painting by Thomas Paul Murphy

Meat Nails a painting by Thomas Paul Murphy
Get your print today!